Feeling content

Feeling content  26.07.16

I suspect this has not been an exploration of the faroes as much as an exploration of tina. Of what does the next twenty years hold for me. How do i want to use my time. I want something more than just being, just existing.

I recall now that i grew to love my time in australia but struggled so terribly in the first few months. The same was true for finland. I remember that now. I like the way my mind romanticises the rewarding times, the companionship and new experiences yet tucks away, acknowledging yet disregarding, the challenging nature of being alone and on the move. Freedom comes at a price.
I have no desire for long term travel again. At least, not for the time being, not for this next year, or the next. It was something i always knew i would do when i retired yet circumstances meant that i chose not to do so. Until now, when my choices led me to a tiny group of islands with all that brings with it.
I have learned to respect but not quite love the Faroes. In time, i will love them more. Hannes, Julia, Joan and Joel will grow as significant people i have met in my time here and i hope to follow their movements with interest. For a while at least.
For today, i must pack. Make my final move for my last two nights back in Midvagur where Marit and the wedding await.
My room is empty, my bags packed. With the decision to leave comes permission to return. I do after all still have a flight booked and ten days in august when my house is rented out.
Working with gypsy travellers i learned not to say goodbyes. Goodbye suggests a not seeing whereas hello always holds promise. Families not seeing each other for long periods would make no show of sadness or excitement on departure and arrival, just a matter of fact hello-ness. Nevertheless i was touched when Joel came to say goodbye this morning as he caught the early ferry, realising that i would be gone when he returns.
Half an hour before my ferry. I drink coffee and ask about the little nolsoy festival. I discover it has swimming events. It coincides with the time i must be away from home. Maybe i return as a tourist, not a traveler. Come for the festival, in a proper room with a proper desk that I can work with. Stay for a week or ten days. Come ready to belong, to be a part of it, even volunteer if there are roles that need doing. Involvement is good. Hannes has room at the moment, i do not feel ready to book now but risk them being gone if i do not do so. So be it.
I shall sleep on my little plan.

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